Living in the Soul (with a bear) is a spiritual memoir that traces one man's journey from childhood faith through decades of questioning to a radical, deeply personal theology built around love, bears, and the revolutionary teachings of Jesus.
Peter Harpley, a 64-year-old former teaching assistant, has believed in God since childhood—but his understanding of that belief has evolved dramatically over six decades. Raised in the Church of England, traumatized by an abusive mother, and sustained by an angel he calls Scrappy (his teddy bear of 63 years), Peter embarks on a theological and personal exploration that challenges orthodox Christianity while reclaiming Jesus's core wisdom.
Part One examines the historical Jesus through a critical historian's lens, questioning the nativity contradictions, exploring the crucifixion's true responsibility, and distinguishing myth from probable historical truth. Peter demonstrates that Jesus existed, taught revolutionary ideas, and was executed by Rome—but that much of what Christianity built around him distorts or literalizes his metaphorical teachings.
Part Two confronts Christianity's shadows: the erasure of Mary Magdalene and the Divine Feminine, the church's enabling of antisemitism from deicide myths to the Holocaust, the violent schisms that betrayed Jesus's pacifism, and the patriarchal hierarchy that contradicted his radical inclusivity.
Part Three chronicles Peter's personal spiritual journey. He grapples with theodicy (the problem of suffering) and finds no satisfactory answer, only acceptance of mystery. He explores Gnosticism's separation of body and soul, which resonates with his lived experience. Most powerfully, he recounts forgiving his abusive mother through prayer-work that transformed rage into connection, and he introduces the reader to his profound relationship with Scrappy and Bloo (another bear)—daimonic presences that connect him directly to God's love. Peter discovers in Cynthia Bourgeault's work the concept of non-dual consciousness as the "Kingdom of Heaven"—not a place you go when you die, but a state of awareness you awaken into now.
Part Four brings the theology into daily practice. Peter describes his prayer life with the bears, his failures at living non-dually (frustration with his daughter's driving lessons), his successes (playing Santa for schoolchildren), and his acceptance of mysteries he cannot resolve. The climax is ... well, you will have to read the book! which you can buy from here.